There’s something interesting about New Year. Even though last Thursday was, in fact, just like any other day, we still see the beginning of a new year as a chance to start something new, to change our life, or to give something that we haven’t accomplished yet another try.

I celebrated New Year’s Eve with a group of friends, and we of course talked about what 2009 will bring and what we hope for. A wedding, a new house with enough room for a growing family, and hopefully winning the lottery to pay for all of that. Or, in my case, another round of the dating game and the chance to hit the jackpot this time.

I sometimes feel like I’m pretty new to this game, a beginner. I’ve only started going on dates a few years ago. Before that, I just wasn’t ready to let anyone into my life, much less my heart. Besides, the few times I had been on a date had felt so awkward that I just stopped going. So when I decided to dive into the dating pool again, or rather for the first time, it was a big deal for me. And being the level-headed person I was back then, I of course wanted to do it right, and to play by the rules. It took a while before I realized that the rules I had in mind weren’t necessarily the rules that others played by, and – even worse – while I was almost desperately trying to play by the rules that I thought applied, I forgot about the most important thing: my own state of mind and my feelings for the person that I was dating. Needless to say, the whole approach had “disaster” written all over it, until I was eventually ready to give it up once and for all and to either wait for a miracle to happen or to revert to Plan B, which was dedicating my life to my work and my career.

Then a few things happened that made me change my mind and convinced me that it’s worth trying. For example, I learned to pay more attention to my own needs and feelings rather than to focus on the needs and expectations of the people I interacted with. And I went on a date that I didn’t even know would be a date, but just meeting someone I’ve known for a while for coffee. Suddenly, I was in the middle of a field test for my newfound approach to dates and relationships, and it actually worked. Well, not the relationship, but my approach. After a few very nice dates and when things finally started to heat up between us, she started to act weird and decided to pull the plug. At least, that’s what I was left to figure from the fact that during our last phone call, she couldn’t have been more hostile if she had just hung up on me and that she seems to have vanished from the face of the earth ever since.

Ironically, even though that experience could have made me stop dating again for a while, it didn’t, because whatever the outcome was, I felt good about myself, and I’m ready to give it another try.

So it’s a new year, a new game and a new shot at love!
(And yes, I did watch too much of Tila Tequila over the holidays).

Picture: www.love-sessions.com

(Posted on eurOut on January 3rd, 2009)

There’s something interesting about New Year. Even though last Thursday was, in fact, just like any other day, we still see the beginning of a new year as a chance to start something new, to change our life, or to give something that we haven’t accomplished yet another try. I celebrated New Year’s Eve ...